Kiwi Rhyming Slang

I'm in London: The Grumpy Apple, The City That Often Sleeps. As an unofficial, non-payed, non diplomatically sanctioned cultural attaché to London it is my job to sniff out innovative ideas that can be adapted to my country of birth. This is how we got Gok Wan and competitive vomiting. One of the things that I think could do very well in New Zealand is Cockney Rhyming Slang—the street-slang invented in the 19^th Century by London merchants to confuse their wives and mistresses.

Here is a story I wrote for a New Zealand magazine on the invention of a Kiwi Rhyming Slang.